“Fazgood” On Sale In Paperback!

17 11 2023

Follow the escapades of The Mad Earl Fazgood in this rollicking tale based on the should-be-true adventures of a delightfully bizarre nobleman run rampant.

All seems straight-forward enough when Fazgood and his compatriots sail in search of his much beloved but ever-elusive moosecrab stew, despite everyone, everywhere wanting him dead for no good reason at all. Sailing from port to port doesn’t seem to evade his executioners so Fazgood goes to the capital of the Kingdom, despite being an exile, hoping for at least one bowl of moosecrab stew before he must surely face his doom.

Instead of moosecrab, however, Fazgood and his outrageous companions find corruption, deception, and an ancient talisman that could easily dissolve the very Kingdom he hates to love.

Fazgood finds himself conniving the highest ranks of society into helping him solve the problem of his imminent demise or, for that matter, the Kingdom’s. And he does what any good hero would do: he crafts a plan so cunning, so secret, even he cannot fathom it.

Join the Mad Earl and his compatriots as they traverse a Kingdom filled with peaceful, god-ruled citizenry ranging from carnivorous plants to sorcerous gas bubbles.

Will he save the Kingdom that set him on his felonious life or will he let the Kingdom be digested?

And will he ever get his god-poxied moosecrab?

WHY WAIT BREATHLESSLY? Order now!

Fazgood and the Obstreperous Moosecrab Caper: The Mad Earl Chronicles




“I love ‘The Flesh Sutra’!” – Nancy Holder, NYT Best-Selling Horror Novelist

19 04 2023

Would you mutilate mankind for love? That is the question of “The Flesh Sutra.” In Fin de siècle Boston, the mystic healer Alecsi Keresh lays in the passionate embrace of his lover Mrs. Olivia Spalding, when he is shot dead. Enraged, he forces his way back to life through ghastly means. He becomes an abomination. All for love. Olivia is terrified of death. Alecsandri dreads abandonment. Seeing one another as soul mates, they resolve to atone for their sins by helping humanity. But their jealousies mar their works, often with hideous results. And a spirit stalks them. One that grows more powerful at every turn. Will the lovers succeed and transform mankind? Or will their weaknesses twist humanity into abominations? Therein lies the answer to “The Flesh Sutra.”





Turn Ideas Into Plots With Tim Waggoner, Prolific and Award-Winning Author

25 04 2024
I’m going to try this!




New TikTok Gets To The Point

24 04 2024




New Business Cards! What Do You Think?

23 04 2024




Starting To Hit Booktok More

18 04 2024

I overthink everything. My TikToks were little video productions and they were fun to make. But the productions were too onerous. So I’m trying a new approach which uses the little data I’ve gathered:

Short and personal. Anything longer than fifteen seconds and there is risk of drop off. Before, I avoided that drop off by putting book titles in the beginning. Now, if I want to produce a volume of ads, I need to be more flexible.

What do you think?





“The Flesh Sutra” Now Available On Audible

17 04 2024

My publisher NobleFusion was selected for a beta (or however you phrase that) by Audible to try out their new self-publishing mode. Human professional narrators were paid for the rights to their voices, and those voices have made this the smoothest listening experience I have heard on an audiobook (except for Jeremy Irons reading “Lolita”, because Jeremy Irons). If you prefer your cosmic body horror in your ears, give this a listen! Long-listed for the 2014 Stokers. Beloved by professionals. This is a very good book! Click on the image today!





Sales Graphs for Fazgood! And Flesh Sutra on Audible!

15 03 2024

Yes! The numbers are tiny! Yes! This is the beginning of a small business! Yes!

What can I learn from these blips? First, see the peaks that go above the whole numbers, plus those tiny blips above zero? Those account for Kindle Unlimited page reads. Of what significance are these peaks?

The peaks are on days when I was active on Bluesky. Every Wednesday, I do #horrorwriterschat, which you know better as “Me Being Witty”. While Fazgood is a fantasy novel, I talk about its horrific elements as well as those for the Flesh books.

The total is about $20 in royalties.

But hey there! You like audiobooks?

“The Flesh Sutra” WILL SOON BE ON Audible!

It’s part of a beta test using Audible’s new virtual voice. I’m not crazy about using virtual voiceovers, but even I have to admit that the technology surprised me. Inflections, emphasis, transitions, all are anticipated. And the interface for adjusting pronunciation and creative direction are easy, if a little crude.

There was no way I or my publisher could afford the time or money for audio production. Just No Frigging Way were we gonna do this ourselves; I burned out my DIY long-production nerves back when I was the editor/producer for video and movies. And if the audiobook versions take off, we can budget then.

These are good things! My reflexive negativity is taking a beating today!





Another Cursed Reader Hauls “The Flesh Sutra”

11 03 2024




NEW TIKTOK DROPPED!

7 03 2024

@tim_w_burke

Fazgood and the Obstreperous Moosecrab Caper ch 1 read by author Tim W. Burke #fantasynovels #epicfantasybooks #terrypratchett #humortiktok

♬ original sound – Tim W Burke




Again With The Wit On The Bluesky.

6 03 2024




I Am Witty On Bluesky!

5 03 2024