Fazgood Is Business and Business Is Booming!

1 12 2023

Multiple-Nom Author Dr. Lawrence M. Schoen…

His readers are reading…

Hildy Silverman, author and editor…

Why wait for others to tell you, when you could be doing the bragging?

Let Fazgood steal his way into your heart this holiday! Let him in and then he’ll leave you, as he always leaves: with the locale literally ablaze!

World Fantasy Convention 2023, Pt 2: Writing “Do’s” With Adam Troy-Castro, Usman Malik, More

4 11 2023

With Ted Chiang, Phillip Dunlop, and a really good article by Annie Dillard.

The first panel I attended was Friday’s “The Worst Advice I Ever Received”. Translating the negative definitions were a little tricky, but here is what the panelists said THAT YOU SHOULD DO AND IS QUITE OKAY TO DO:

Adam Troy-Castro: “‘Said-Bookisms’ are OK. Use them.” (‘Said-Bookisms’ are when a character dialogue has ‘explained’ or ‘stated’ or any description of intention versus physicality. I use them sometimes to reinforce physicality, but maybe I’ll use them more).

Usman Malik: Quoting Annie Dillard’s article Write Till You Drop “You were made and sent here to give voice to your astonishment.”

Phillip Dunlop: “Never listen to your own advice.” (I phrase that often as “You got your own ass lost in the woods. To get out, get a Ranger.”)

Ted Chiang: “Writing for a living limits you.” (Meaning having to rely on writing to pay your bills urges you to write what is financially practical and stop experimenting.)

All: “Tax pros are worth the money.”

AT-C: “Do not listen to people who tell you to stop trying.”

UM: “What is ‘success’, anyway? Anyone can make salable art.”

PD: “Know your objective. Know your audience.”

AT-C: “Publishers, answer your emails.”

UM: “You can use slurs, as long as they are necessary to the plot.”

All: “There are no limits. Write your style.”

AT-C: “Editors and editorial staff are your friends. Be nice to them. Bring donuts.”

Pre-Order The Newest, Funniest Fantasy Of The Year! Only $3.99 for 120K Startling Words!

2 11 2023

An epic thief enters middle-age mad, bad, and dangerously neurotic. After a life of offending entire civilizations, that thief Fazgood smuggles himself and compatriots back into his home city…the city that Wants Him Dead. Once smuggled, he uncovers an earth-shattering secret, multiple traitor-ings, a new type of magic and more, all toward his goal: a home-cooked meal. Or did Fazgood send himself on a mission so secret that he himself doesn’t know the mission exists? To quote: “That is the sort of thing I would do, the bastard.”

Unorthodox plotline with a major twist! Death-defying, absurd heroism! Sensuous massages! Villains villains villains! A narrative voice that will make you say “does that word exist? and if not, it should!”

Meet Fazgood! His brilliant familiar Warren the weasel! Fazgood’s entourage: the panplasmic Calzjha!

Can Fazgood win the day? Can he defeat the villains and save the kingdom that Wants Him Dead? Will he get his fluxion-damned meal?

Pre-order now for ONLY $3.99! Do not wait! Your very soul needs this book!

NEW BOOK! Launching at World Fantasy Con!

18 10 2023

Follow the escapades of The Mad Earl Fazgood in this rollicking tale based on the should-be-true adventures of a delightfully bizarre nobleman run rampant.  

All seems straight-forward enough when Fazgood and his compatriots sail in search of his much beloved but ever-elusive moosecrab stew, despite everyone, everywhere wanting him dead for no good reason at all.  Sailing from port to port doesn’t seem to evade his executioners so Fazgood goes to the capital of the Kingdom, despite being an exile, hoping for at least one bowl of moosecrab stew before he must surely face his doom. 

Instead of moosecrab, however, Fazgood and his outrageous companions find corruption, deception, and an ancient talisman that could easily dissolve the very Kingdom he hates to love.

Fazgood finds himself conniving the highest ranks of society into helping him solve the problem of his imminent demise or, for that matter, the Kingdom’s.  And he does what any good hero would do: he crafts a plan so cunning, so secret, even he cannot fathom it.

Join the Mad Earl and his compatriots as they traverse a Kingdom filled with peaceful, god-ruled citizenry ranging from carnivorous plants to sorcerous gas bubbles.

Will he save the Kingdom that set him on his felonious life or will he let the Kingdom be digested?

And will he ever get his god-poxied moosecrab?

Do you like “Our Flag Means Death”? The absurdity of Terry Gilliam?

About 45 years in the making! All yours for Halloween!

Today, Celebrate The Saints Of Flesh

19 09 2023

An undead sorceress in San Francisco needs her daemon lover. But some fool stole her only way to find him. To find him, she possesses a cancer patient. What they find is a new hell within….

Amazon.com: Saints of Flesh: The Flesh Sutra Sequel eBook : Burke, Tim: Kindle Store

Brandon Sanderson on Epic Stakes

2 09 2023

How do you create tension in an Epic Fantasy setting? How do you build community? What is a reader’s most basic expectation? This piece on Brandon Sanderson and his surrounding industry answers all those questions.

Brandon Sanderson Is Your God | WIRED

World Building Advice From Stephen Morgan

27 07 2023

Worldbuilding for Science Fiction and Fantasy Resources
Compiled by Stephen Morgan
Jason Sanford’s Patreon (FREE!) Genre Grapevine alone will keep you informed and up-to-date
on the sci-fi/fantasy side of publishing: https://www.patreon.com/jasonsanford
The Dark Fantastic by Ebony Elizabeth Thomas: critical race theory applied to sci-fi/fantasy
Don’t Think of an Elephant by George Lakoff: political psychology in modern society
Disfigured by Amanda Leduc: disability representation in sci-fi/fantasy fiction
Soft vs Hard Sci-fi:
Using sci-fi/fantasy to analyze the real world:
Common sci-fi/fantasy terms: https://er.jsc.nasa.gov/seh/SFTerms.html
Question 1: Is this a good-hearted, mean-spirited, or apathetic world?
Question 2: How do your characters think about money/trade?
Question 3: Do characters expect a fair shake from the justice system?
Question 4: Do your characters perceive class and racial differences?
Question 5: How do you make the presence/absence of differences
Question 5: relatable?
Question 6: What guides your character’s morality?
Question 7: What is the status quo?
Question 8: Does your character feel at home in the world?

One Night, A Beam Of Light Strikes A Mountain Highway

Social Media To Help Book Sales, As Of Today

12 05 2023
people looking at books
Changing the cover of “Puke Slugs of Planet Feculon” increased sales, but at what cost to credability?Photo by Dario Fernandez Ruz on Pexels.com

My publisher Noble Fusion Press works with professional marketers. Recently, the podcast Rit Gud with Racquel M. Benedict discussed effective strategies with author and marketer Megen Cubed. My publisher and the podcast agreed in what social media performs best in book sales and community building.

First, some general advice. “Common wisdom” for selling to SF, fantasy, and horror changes over time. This advice is different than the advice you would have seen even a few years ago. The advice will be different in a few years. The advice will be different for each genre, yes, but there apparently is overlap.

For example, a few years ago there were people making a living by gaming the algorithms of Amazon, Facebook, and Twitter. Now?

DO NOT BOTHER. These sites change their rules too frequently. It used to be that fifty Amazon reviews got your book onto their “Recommended For You”. Now? No one seems to know.

Ads? DO NOT BOTHER. Facebook ads are too poorly placed. Blocking Twitter ads are an official hobby. Amazon return of investment is too low unless you’re already selling well.

The common wisdom in this year is to test sites like Book Bub. Be methodical in seeing if each site increases your sales. Channel all communications toward building your mailing list.

How To Prepare For Book Launches Pt 2

4 04 2023
person reading book in city
Once again, not me. But marketing surveys say I rate very well among Sheet Ghosts.
Photo by Ayşenur Sağlam on Pexels.com

This is to catch myself up on what I’m doing in the next couple of months:

Prepare a presentation/reading for the launch(s):

it’s tough to get a slot for an author reading, so apply early. Most conventions allow you to just request a slot; the Horror On Main convention requires the author to buy a vendor table as well for IIRC $200? It’s promotional expense so if I make more than $4K from the books this year I can write off the expense yadda yadda. So step one, get those slots requested.

Prepare the reads/presentations. Usually the author will be given 30 minutes to do a reading and/or what’s called an “anti-reading”. An anti-reading can be anything like a presentation about the novel’s world or a free-form discussion or really it has no boundaries. At present, I plan on fifteen minutes of reading and a fifteen-minute presentation about the fun stuff I discovered while researching the “Flesh” books. I may include a Powerpoint. For the Fazgood launch at World Fantasy, at present I’ll just do a reading.

Get stuff into hands and onto tables: Conventions usually give attendees a swag bag, or a bag filled with promotional materials. My publisher Noble Fusion Press is getting post cards or other materials to World Fantasy to give the launch a boost. For Horror On Main, and more so for StokerCon, I have to get on the stick and find out if they do swag bags. Tables will need signage, which I image will have to small to accommodate travel.

Yes I am nervous about all this.

Contact the relevant media: the Horror Writers Association has a newsletter, and I have to get my Horror On Main and StokerCon plans to its editors.

Supporting promo material: I’m working with a talented artist friend to come up with yantra stickers. Yantra are mystical symbols key to the “Flesh” mythos. I believe stickers are the way to go, because even if no one is interested in the book, they may like the sticker design and get interest developed that way. I’ve seen the preliminary colors and they are disturbing. Plan is to have them done by end of April.

List of people to contact: I’m shooting for podcasters, mainly. I’m funny and have a varied, colorful history. Obvioulsly, the “Flesh” books and Fazgood have two different audiences, with different persons of interest to contact.

I’ll keep you posted, obvs.

Update! Cover Artists! Mine Is Really Good!

18 03 2023

This artist calls themselves “HumbleNations” and their business is “Go On Write”, which URLs as “goonwrite” or as I see it “goon write”, which I like more. It’s worth clicking on a book and seeing his examples, if just for a look at the mock-up titles…

Their blog is also Brithumorlicious.

What of my covers? There will be a release soon….