Why Your Fantasy Novel Sucks
28 03 2017Comments : Leave a Comment »
Tags: books, fantasy fiction, novels, Sucks
Categories : Writing, Writing Advice
I Seep Toward My Petri Dish: An Update and Story Prompts
5 01 2017Almost 150 people are following my posts through WordPress. Various others drop by thanks to Facebook, Twitter, and links from where I have published.
Thank you, all of you, for your attention.
I’ve been struggling to figure out what I can do to be worthy of that attention. I can give writing advice, but I keep finding links to other writers that say what I was going to say anyway.
Like this Feelings Wheel. They seem popular, so I’ll keep doing that.
Most of you like strange but true stuff and story prompts.
Like this one where Slime Mold Solves Problems. Read this! It’s so cool! So yeah, I’ll keep doing those.
I’m 35K into a sequel to my Stoker Jury Recommended novel “The Flesh Sutra”.
Have you read this? Professional writers agree “The Flesh Sutra” is cool.
The working title is “The Flesh Frequency” and it is set in 1971 San Fransisco. It’s not going to be as body horror as TFS, but I’ve got some frightful stuff happening in the Carruthers House as some paranormal investigators go in to figure out strange goings on.
I’m trying to pull a little slight of hand that I saw done in the haunted house movie “Session Nine” (have you seen it? It’s creeeepy!). In the meantime, happy little ideas have allowed me to vent on things I liked about the era, like the music was pretty boss; and about things I do not like, like the predatory sexuality, drug abuse, and the sun-blinded optimism of the times. The Breendoggle makes an appearance. Look that up and get skeeved.
Also, I am working with my publisher Noble Fusion Press to better promote our quality works from our award-winning, attractive authors.
So here I am, my own little slime mold intuiting my way to the petri dish of agar, which for me would be my own quiet apartment in a metropolitan area and a healthy relationship, hoping this year brings you plenty of sugar and other genotypes with which to fuse.
That was forced, yes, but I have to keep an edge.
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Tags: body horror, fantasy fiction, fantasy writing, horror novel, speculative fiction, speculative novels, speculative writing
Categories : Stoker, The Flesh Sutra, Writing, Writing Advice, Writing Ideas
Chewing Out From An Eyesocket Soon At A Bargain Rate
25 09 2016and other sad fates await later this week! On the preliminary ballot for the 2014 Stoker Awards and ready for your eager eyes. Only $.99 this coming Friday.
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Tags: body horror, fantasy fiction, horror, horror fiction, horror movies, horror novels, horror writing, speculative fiction, writing
Categories : Fiction, The Flesh Sutra
Writers: “Start Small, Then You Build”
4 09 2016
Here’s a feller who invokes Pixar and Hugh Howey to let you know:
- Enovels don’t need to be all that big no matter the genre
- Take your time with your ideas
- Redraft and redraft. There are award-winning professionals who start with neat ideas, but do not put the work in on polishing.
- Will I say any names? If I get annoyed enough one day I just might.
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Tags: fantasy fiction, fantasy novels, horror fiction, horror novels, novel writing, speculative fiction, writing
Categories : Writing Advice
We Are Fashion Meat: A Disquieting Pause
27 07 2016
You Could Cover Your Butt With Your Own Butt! Chuck Tingle Take Note!
Fa-Fa-Fa-Fashion!
In his famous song, not even David Bowie could forsee the newest trend in high-end coverings: Using somebody else!
The artist made this announcement to generate buzz for her vat-grown leather biology patents. At most, she would want to create her Original McQueen for art exhibits a la Body Worlds or the Mutter Museum. This discounts its horrid potential. What is fashion but a challenge to the status quo?
F. Paul Wilson presents a woman who rises to that challenge in his short story “Foet”. Fashionistas create underground couture handbags made from the skin of aborted fetuses. The implication: If aborted fetuses truly aren’t people, then why not treat them as product? The woman overcomes her squeamish morals when presented with the butter-smooth avant garde. Problem: Body Worlds is already making art with volunteer human exhibits. Volunteer fashion wear by Body Worlds should take about twenty years, I think.
In the movie “Antiviral” by Brandon Cronenberg, it becomes fashion to cultivate viruses caught from pop culture performers. When a virus reproduces, it uses the DNA of its host to make new copies of itself. If you catch a flu from Alex Trebek, part of the Jeopardy host is made a permanent part of your dna. Used kleenexes from singers and actors become hot commodities for fans who are the ultimate wannabes. The wealthy and insane will want to spread some love too.
The first vaccines for this affluenza will be for the first outbreak of Kardashian Flu. Sorry, the vaccines will be issued by the CDC, not Starfleet.
“Antiviral” also posits restaurants specializing in food products vat grown from leading pop culture icons. Not only could you eat, drink, savor your fave superstar’s biological flavors, you can choose from different ages. At age 50, Is Bruce Willis tougher than at 20? Can you taste adrenaline in Rihanna before she divorced Chris Brown?
If you bois want to sex up Miley Cyrus, you can! Pleather sex toys embossed with Miley’s DNA arrive in just a few years. I’ll be ordering from the Sasha Grey collection, myself. Grrls can enjoy intimacy of devices with authentic moves thanks to motion capture programming in the devices a.i.. First male celeb with these dna embossed toys: an NBA All-Star, but the genes will be pirated. Or will they? 😉
Patent your genomes now, because the laws are gray and shady regarding who owns development rights to your sequence. Is it you? The doctor who got you to sign something? The company who cultured you into a multi-billion dollar industry a la Henrietta Lacks? Or if someone just happens to find your dandruff, do they get Rights-of-Salvage if those flakes are unclaimed?
Uplifted, uploaded, post-human, trans-human, all flesh is on display, up for grabs, and ready to sell. Be sure to cover your ass or someone will sell it out from under you!
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Tags: comedy, comedy writing, fantasy fiction, horror, horror fiction, horror writing, humor, humor novels, humor writing, sketch comedy, speculative fiction
Categories : Disquieting Pause, Uncategorized
My Prayer For Spec-Fic
9 06 2016Oh Lord, are You there? My soul thirsts for You. Could You give me a Double-Gulp helping of You?
I yearn for a sf movie without “Star” in the title. I yearn for something that JJ Abrams hasn’t tainted with his signature TV cinematography and Slusho world-building. I yearn for Damon Lindoff to live a productive and happy life without the ability to write.
Some movie worthy of a franchise that isn’t already populated with 70 year olds from other franchises. A movie without The Wilhelm Scream. A movie that wasn’t produced simultaneously with three of its sequels. A movie smart enough to have its own language and culture, yet still smart enough to not hide its MacGuffin behind the name “Unobtanium” and keep its villains out of military uniforms and business suits, just once.
Something that doesn’t happen in a high school either midwestern or Asian.
I so thirts for a horror movie without a death in a car where an arm punches through the driver’s chest. Without someone crawling on the ceiling. Without a garish, flat spiritworld where everyone just smiles creepy or sings songs in public domain. Without the Christian being a hypocrite or worse. Without an explanation of why the monster came to be. Without being a disappointing remake.
Without lush childrens’ storybook styling to remind us this is a Metaphor.
People know when a movie is going to suck. They go anyway to be part of the event and be able to discuss the merits of the movie. Even M. Night Shamalan has had little effect.
Could we have a spec-fic show that’s brightly lit? In a nice, clean world? An original world without characters from story books?
Can we have real teenagers who act and speak like real teenagers? Who have sharp-eyed, meddling, loving adults involved in their lives? Can we have actual old people?
We spend our lives making money. We give this money to movies and books and TV. The art is consumimg our lives, yet is made of parts long dead. Now not only is it a zombie (slow moving), it’s and being further shaved of its face and features so it can shamble into China and digest the Chinese.
I can’t be the only one who feels this way, Lord of Hosts, Host of All Media.
And get people to turn off their tablets in theaters, too.
Amen.
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Tags: fantasy fiction, fantasy movies, fantasy novels, horror, horror novels, movies, Science Fiction, science fiction movies, speculative fiction, tv
Categories : Unsettling Questions
Ever Have A Dream That Stayed? What’s In You Is Far More Compelling
28 01 2016Occult and Outsider Imagery – have a look.
Ever have a dream that made you wake up in a cold sweat? I did once when I was seven. The dream was a melange of Hanna-Barbara cartoons, featuring a waist-up shot of a middle-aged hillbilly woman who had begun to fade to leave the generic wooden shack background. She laughed a deep, cartoony laugh and was joined by other stereotypical rustics laughing unseen. The graphic came up: “Ghoul Gals”. I sat up in bed for the only time in my life, my skin chilled and wet.
A spot of potato? More of the gravy than the grave? Even if dyspepsia inspired the discomfort that made the dream, why that dream? More to the point, what in that dream could be conveyed to others?
You are a consciousness in a body within a society extended by technology. So is everyone else. The fonts and images in your mind will connect with others. Expertise polishes your message until it shines through preconceptions and shows your true, intended meaning. Sometimes, that means seeing your own preconceptions.
Why villains? Why vampires or werewolves? Aliens? Ghosts? Why not rustic Ghoul Gals living in a cartoon?
Okay, to make money, sure. I’ll write those things if I have a neat idea that’ll sell. Or for you, maybe those ideas have a more resounding effect than for most people. What is it that resounds? What does it feel like? What behavior went uncanny?
Have you had a dream that stayed with you?
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Tags: body horror, fantasy fiction, fantasy writing, horror fiction, horror writing, specualtive writing
Categories : Unsettling Questions, Writing, Writing Advice