Fucking Austrians with their fucking prancy-dancy minuets.
When the vampire has to get a ride home with the werewolf, who drives? What kind of car?
If Van Helsing was Catholic and Jonathan Harker an Anglican, does than mean the Nicean Creed is right? Would a Mormon with a cross repel a vampire? A Unitarian?
Could Satan postpone the Apocalypse until the heat death of the universe?
People usually keep the accent of their youth. Would a 700 year old still have his original accent?
Is “fumagous” a word?
What does rot really smell like?
If my women characters never talk to each other, do I still pass the Bechdel Test?
Are there disparaging names for “Austrians”?
If he’s a wimp on page one, how can I have him do the Insanely Gross Martial Arts Move within a week?
Is it possible for a neurotic character to have a romance and not be Woody Allen?
Can it still be a paranormal romance parody if there is no sex?
If I insult everybody, is it cultural appropriation?
For the cover, do I go with the comical fishhead in front of the naked woman’s abs, or with a man-fish with naked abs?
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